I have found some of my most exhilarating moments of self-expression and self-knowledge while writing songs and singing. That’s my favorite creative outlet. I’ve always known that music is my thing but I was a little shy about doing something that is so public. You can’t practice singing without anyone hearing you! And living in an apartment you KNOW the next-door neighbor is enjoying the listening session! But I got over it and now, to some degree, music keeps me sane. There’s no way to know exactly what the perfect outlet is for you to express yourself unless you try a whole bunch of things. Eventually something will click. Maybe you’re the next Annie Liebowitz or Sarah Silverman? Who knows? You won’t until you try, fail, try again, and finally hit on what makes you feel most like YOU. If it feels good, go with it!
A really good friend of mine introduced me to the book THE ARTISTS WAY https://goo.gl/AsWNG2 a few years back and it LITERALLY changed my life. It’s an amazing guide to tapping into your inner voice, the core of who you are, whether you want to be a professional artist or just get in touch with yourself. Whether you want to paint, sing, write, or be a lawyer doesn’t matter; what matters is that you’re opening yourself up to a new way of expressing yourself. When that happens, you’ll be shocked at what you have to say that you’ve never known was ready to come out of you! It’s my personal go-to guide. Whenever I feel disconnected: from myself, from the world, it’s the perfect tool I use to get back on track.
There are SO many ways to find your way to a healthier way of thinking about yourself and the world around you, it all starts within you. We always wait for our environment and people within it to tell us how to act, how to feel etc. But it’s totally backwards! It starts within YOU. Sometimes that’s hard because our whole lives we’re told what we think/feel is wrong, so it makes us questions ourselves. I challenge you to find YOUR identity-not who your parents think you should be, how your teachers tell you to act etc. , how your boyfriend (or girlfriend) wants you to act , but how YOU truly feel. We all think we know how we feel but do we? Our minds and spirits are such complicated things that it’s okay to need help and guidance in this department. I know I do! We don’t have all the answers, and that’s okay! If you’re really feeling lost and in need of guidance out of depression and/or anxiety, seeing a licensed therapist or psychiatrist can be a wonderful starting point. And no, therapy isn’t just for “crazies” or people with severe issues, I think everyone should see a therapist! The human mind is a complicated thing to try to figure out, so why not have some help and guidance with it! I love this article on the blog XOJANE that talks you through how to find a therapist on your own. It’s really down to earth and simple. http://www.xojane.com/healthy/how-to-find-good-therapist There are other things you can do on your own that help you to know yourself better and, as a result, make better life choices for you specifically. Better life choices, once you give them a chance to take effect, always seem to lead to greater happiness and fulfillment, they do for me, I hope they do for you!
Okay, I’m a plus size model. Not exactly breaking news right? But I’m amazed at how many people are confused by what that means. Some people think that I’m all about “making friends with fat”, or promoting obesity, or in some other way supporting the idea that being overweight is a good thing. That’s not my message nor is it my life at all. What I care about more than anything is being healthy. We all have different bodies, different builds and different weights at which our bodies naturally do best. I’m 5’11” and a size 12. For me, that’s a healthy body shape. I know its healthy because I get annual checkups, get blood tests, have my vital signs examined… the whole nine yards. And my body is running well, thanks to a healthy diet and lots of exercise. If I wanted to be a “straight size” model, I’d have to do very unhealthy things to my body to get there. So guess what? I’m not a “straight size” model and that’s OKAY. No use trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. That’s a total recipe for frustration and ruining my self-esteem. No Thanks! There are plenty of other things to work on in this lifetime! I’m sure you’ve heard this before: accept your body as it is, don’t fight it, and make it the healthiest you can! I always knew I’d never look like Kate Moss, but at my healthiest I can strive for Beyoncé! And I’m perfectly happy with that. Find a REALISTIC goal for yourself. That’s the healthy mind part of the equation; you have to think in a realistic way in order to steer yourself in the right direction with your physical health. That’s the lesson I live by. It starts with your mind and a healthy mind IS a healthy body, they go hand in hand. But accepting my body and that I’m not a size 0 doesn’t mean that I’m in favor of sitting around eating food filled with junk. But don’t deprive yourself either! If you want a cookie have one, just not the whole sleeve! In other words, my message is, eat healthy in moderation, exercise sufficiently and let the chips (not potato chips) fall where they may. It’s so simple, why do we complicate it?!